Pregnancy is such an exciting and special time in a woman’s life. But it can also be scary and overwhelming. It is really important to be able to surround yourself with loving friends and family to support you through it. It is also important for those loving, caring people to understand that there are certain things you should completely avoid when talking to a pregnant woman. If you find yourself in the position of being part of a pregnant woman’s inner circle, this article is for you.
Anything Related to Weight
This is so important. Do not think, under any circumstances, that it is okay to talk about a pregnant woman’s weight. Even if she brings it up. You must be very careful to just remind her that she is beautiful. She knows if she should be being more careful about what she is eating or if she should be exercising more. This works both ways, too. Some women are very sensitive about being told they are too skinny during their pregnancy. It is never your place to say anything about weight, NEVER! If you need specifics, here is a list of phrases to avoid.
● Are you sure you aren’t having twins?
● Do you think you should eat that?
● You’re so tiny; you don’t even look pregnant.
● You look like your ready to pop.
Horror Stories
Everyone knows that when you are pregnant, things can go wrong. Most women spend a good portion of their pregnancy trying to avoid thinking about the ‘what ifs.’ It is not helpful when people want to tell you all about their scary preterm delivery, or all the time their baby spent in the NICU. It is also especially important not to tell a first-time mom how hard your labor was. They are very aware that they will have to get this baby out of their body, one way or another. Their experience will definitely be different than yours and you telling them a scary story will just add to their worry. Please remember, you are supposed to be supporting this person, not terrifying them. Encourage them to focus on all the exciting things going on and to not worry about something unless it becomes a problem.
Anything Related To Getting Pregnant
Even though more and more people are opening up about their journey to parenthood, some people still feel quite reserved about this topic. You never know if someone has suffered through miscarriage or infertility. This is a very private topic for some people. You should never assume you know what someone has been through. It may have taken them years to get pregnant, or they may have exhausted all their resources to pay for infertility treatments. It can be very hurtful for them to hear you say some things you wouldn’t think twice about saying. Here are a few things you should never say.
● It’s about time!
● Are you going to have more kids after this?
● Was this planned?
Thoughts on How to Parent
Every baby is different, and so is every parent. Just because you feel like you have mastered the art of raising perfect children, doesn’t mean everyone feels the same way that you do about parenting. This is a topic that people get really heated about. It’s fine to give parenting advice when people ask, but never assume your pregnant friend will appreciate unsolicited advice. You don’t want to cause a rift in your friendship.
Now that you have a better idea of what not to say during this sensitive time, you are ready to be part of the support system your pregnant friends need. Pregnant women can be emotional and sensitive. It is so important to remember to lift them up and encourage them during this time. The best part is that at the end of all of this you will be rewarded by getting to be a part of a sweet little baby’s life.
