Most of us endure the same thought process throughout adolescence and young adulthood. At 18, you can’t seem to grow older fast enough. At 25, reality hits and turning 30 is now on your radar – something you never thought possible. Countless women around you lament about growing older and leaving their 20s, so the only conclusion you can reach is that turning 30 is a death sentence.
Since I was 26, the looming thought of my 30th birthday weighed on my heart constantly. I felt pressured to enjoy my last few years of “youth” and had a misguided idea that I would suddenly be undesirable once I entered this decade of life. Even though my older siblings, parents and friends continuously reassured me that my fears were unwarranted, nothing anyone said could convince me that my life wasn’t over at 29.
At the ripe age of 32, I’ve found that years of good sleep, exercise, proper skincare, healthy hair, therapy, a balanced diet and trying to combat life’s stressors in whatever way possible made turning 30 feel like just another day (after the shock wore off, of course). Below are a few myths I believed and thankfully debunked a couple of years following my dreaded 30th birthday.
Myth #1: I’ll only become less attractive with age.
Reality: I much prefer my hair, facial structure, makeup, style and physique at age 32 to when I was 22. In fact, I see photos of myself from my early-to-mid 20s and cringe at some of my hairstyle choices, makeup routines and residual baby fat that made my face look twice as round as it actually should be. With age, my face has thinned out, meaning I have a less naïve default facial expression, allowing others to take me more seriously professionally, personally and romantically. I stopped trying to keep up with every new and expensive hair trend and have embraced my hair’s natural color and texture. Would 25-year-old Amy have ever expected to feel this way seven years later? Absolutely not – which is proof that feelings are just feelings, and that, sometimes, they lie.
Myth #2: Dating will be nearly impossible after 30.
Reality: If anything, I have had more dating prospects within the last two years than I ever did in my 20s. I’ve gained wisdom which allows me to remain (somewhat) more level-headed than my younger self, I’ve gained life experience and knowledge, which can be intellectually stimulating to eligible men, and I have wittier stories to tell. The cliché saying that it’s “not all about looks” has always been true, but I’ve found that the aura or energy I emit in my 30s has been more effective at attracting a male suitor than my insecure, inexperienced and overly emotional aura in my 20s. Even though I have yet to find my perfect match, the internal work I have done on myself over the last few years with the help of a therapist has better prepared me for a healthy relationship in the future.
Myth #3: My body is going to start hurting everywhere.
Reality: I could be speaking prematurely, but thanks to my consistent exercise routine throughout my young adult life, I feel like I have just as much physical energy and mobility now as I did at 25. I don’t over-indulge in alcohol, I get an appropriate amount of sleep and I have finally found a balance between moderation and obsessing over diet and exercise. I used to believe that I had to lift heavier weights than I truly wanted and push myself constantly to feel comfortable in my own skin; however, I am grateful that, with time, I have seen that it’s absolutely okay to take breaks here and there. Resting and not being “on the grind” for a couple of weeks on occasion isn’t going to turn me into a disgusting troll or undo years of hard work. Some evenings of rest and Netflix are just as valuable to my body and mind as a hard gym session.